What’s one positive trait you’ve gained because of BPD?
Last Updated: 02.07.2025 00:41
Its like, taking poison, and hoping the other person will die.
So whats the point in blame.
With Catholic nuns and Church on Sundays.
FromSoft acknowledges issues with Elden Ring Nightreign matchmaking - Eurogamer
5 of us kids, and it wasn’t a big house.
So, i spoilt her more .
Ive learnt so much.
I forgave my father, and i took care of him ,until his death in 1999..my mum left us on the 29th Jan 1998.
Trauma lives in the body, as ive explained, but it actually this that kills you in the end.
I was writing from the time i was a small child.
Who is Meghan Markle and why is she so controversial on the Internet?
We born here on earth , for the soul to learn , the contrast, of heaven.
The same beautiful brown eyes my mother loved so much!
He’d bring us out ,and we would form the position .
What did i know ?
And i know him well ,and every thing about him. This relationship, is the only real one iIve been able to keep!
We didn’t no it wasn;t normal life..we were isolated, and taken from Dublin in Ireland ,where our whole mothers family lived , to Liverpool in England!
How do you raise well-behaved children?
I let him have the joy of his friends( that i would never know myself.!)
Its mostly always from childhood abuse .
At this time i had honed my heart to the same, as that of a lion and i knew i wouldn’t beg or cry ,nor plead.
We could never speak unless he spoke to us!
I might have to go back 30 generations or more..
She said her life with him ,was love, and spoke to me of all the passion, it had brought her.
The Opener: Teel, Cubs, Tigers, Langeliers - MLB Trade Rumors
Do all the shopping, and cooking and look after all the dogs.
But people really die of the Big T Trauma!!
Ther’s very good reasons why i was left alone.
And ive living now since 2005, on disablement .(Which is a pittance)
Those are used to try and block the pain, like that of my life out..
It will be my last birthday ,as im dying of a brain tumor and 8 other autoimune diseases.
Enhanced Box Score: Phillies 4, Cubs 3 – June 9, 2025 - Bleacher Nation
She got all dolled up, but it looked as she was dressed up to play the part of , Florence Nightingale ,as she descended down the cottage stairs ,like a Queen.
One was a lump hammer, another was a iron chisel.
Although he,d calmed down a bit ..he still shouted his orders at me and thought , my older sister would be better at the job..
Northern Lights Alert: 8 States May See Aurora Borealis Monday Night - Forbes
It was going to be , some day.
And as she herself ,wasn’t kissed or touched as a child.
He was dying to do it , i knew.
State of Play Confirmed for 4th June, 40+ Minutes of PS5 Games - Push Square
I could never make a relationship work though!
I was the most vunerable of my siblings. I was born small ,and was sickly ,and of course none of us could ever thrive!
She found it foreign!.
BPD only comes to a person who has suffered childhood trauma.
We were not on the streets..
For him, I cleaned and cooked and shopped, and spent the whole day, doing a weeks work) in the only day off, i had, besides Sunday.)
Thats was my nicest nick name for him
I worked then as a chef ,and a very good one.
I write beautiful poetry .
As i said though i will be 64 on my last birthday!
I only stopped writing poetry recently, because , of my brain tumor
But im dying ,and its too late for me.
And if you hold on to hate you only die inside yourself,!
She stayed with him because she thought he,d grow out of it. He didn’t of course!
My mum and dad in the seventies!
Although we always gave her a kiss on the cheek. She would shrink away from it!
But i am married 43 years to my husband this July !
But im an empath, and i help lots of people.
She wouldn,t have been !
I got to know the terrible awful childhood, he had himself. And his Jolly Pub Persona.
I said to her
And as runt ,of the litter .Which of course, i actually was!
I was grabbed out of my mother hung upside down, and rushed up to the prenatal ward, to spend 4 mths alone, with, only medical staff.
Im a true spealist, because i study it for years .And i still do..
I have no regrets .
I did it because my mum asked me too!
She married twice! .
He said i reminded him of an old aunt ,who used to beat him, and when the menapause came, she was placed in a mental home and never was released ,until she died.
My only sister also couldn,t make her life work.
Trauma never leaves you! Its actually lives in the fashia ,of the body .The connective tissue.
Because , i didnt have the heart to hurt my friend.!.
Another so called friend had bit the dust..
He was a brick layer (when he worked at all) and he carried his tools around ,hanging from a money belt.
As she had lost her son ,to fatty liver disease!
I was scared of men, in general
I had hoped to write a book about this .
Was to survive, this bastard.
When she asked me how she looked .
He resisted the act ,that day.
I was seconnd youngest,
He call us down, from where ever he stashed each one of us ,that day ! We were kept seperate.!
But, we were locked up after school.
You’d think that being brought up for so long, in those terrible circumsatances ,i would know the ways of people ,and the world, but i wasn,t in , nor of the world .
We were all going out this night to a fancy resteraunt.
But my sister and my other 3 brothers wouldn’t have come near him every again!
Where the ultimate outsiders.
Her first husband, had been a gay man ,and he was a lovely person.
This is soul school!.
But i went to school ,and was locked up evey evening , until he was off out on a bender..then mum would set us free, and we,d be bouncing off the walls,
One cannot live in the past .
As is all addictions, people can’t leave off.
And i lived it daily.
I only knew my twisted world , and there, is no choice for a child but to live in it. Or Die in it!
All the time i was locked up.
.I left my 2 sons and my husband to do it. Instead of spending the day with them
But it has taught me many things other people will , never know!
As i do to all so called friends.?
I was very sick at this time too.
He isn,t a very sexual person at the best of times!
Like some twisted love , they where addicted to each other
Youll pack your bags and leave Dorset.
So i became my fathers slave and he hated me the most.
I waited trembling.
Who then, do I blame.?
I wasn’t taught any boundries, our home ,was like any war zone , and Dad told us, he had bodies buried, under the floor boards.
Insight, and i can spot a wrongin from 3 miles away.
I watched his eyes light up and his twisted smile rejoice, in his joy of it all.
Stress hormones Adrenaline and Cortosol ,would have flooded my brain, and they never left it!!!!
Being very nice and never wanting to say the wrong thing.
I suffer greatly, because of BPD..
My familys so full of ancestral BIG T Trauma.
My family never makes their pension either.
I had many talking therapys , but they just don,t work.
Rather to engertic for me ,with my terrible health, but i was left to run the house, it was a Cottage in Dorset.
One of his many names for me was Runt .He like that it rhymed with (well you know)
Anyway ,i could never hold on to a relationship.
She was a women, a mother with her own children!.
Why ? because Trauma depletes the immune system.you get terribley ill , with chronic disease from all the horror ,and stress of it.
He’d sit me down, and stand behind the chair, Then he’d make a great show of his beauty (the chesil )and place it behind my neck ,at the base!
Put me off passion for life!!
Anyway, i told my husband ,and he was gobsmacked.
But it wasn’t much.
She died at 55 of colon cancer.
That life, was meant to be , as the world teaches us great lessons, and leaves us many gifts.
She died young (from the stress and abuse of Big T Trauma) of liver cancer!
Due to the real legacy of trauma (B.P.D)
My life is so biszare .
Also my liver and lungs are fatally diseased!
My place (mostly )was the coal hole..it was a small room heaped with coal .
Because huge Trauma like mine is alive.
You don’ t get a state one here , in England ? until your at least 67 yrs old ! Im 63.
(And it was in our own minds.)
We wern’t close any more, the family fractured, after my Mothers death, and seeing me annoyed them ,as i was the familys scapegoat..
Its a big thing in the States for the last 25 years.
When he wanted one of his lessons to be taught!
Thats being isolated in a house, locked up as a child .We never saw any people except in School and we had no relatives in Liverpool!
A line in front of him, from the eldest to the youngest.
As his daughter ,he didn’t even think I wouldn,t do it. (Look after him)
He knew the spot.
I ended up cooking for her, and bringing her eveywhere with us.
My dad was a alcholic psychopath, and violent in the extreme.
On the 31st of Jan this month .
And who doesn’t know suffering?
I was 9 years of age.
But he said ,he was sick of her anyway ,and only put up with her as i had a friend ,and seemed to be happy.
I of course replied” arh beautiful!
He weighed in at 5 lbs .I was the second born, and i weighed 3 and a half pounds.
The only rule us 5 kids had .
Mine was extreme ,and lasted 19 years
As i gave and gave ,everything to people, they began to use me.
His abuse (his own) began at 2 years of age. His mothers friend, sexually abused him, from the age of 2.
But ive been too sick for many years..
I couldn’t, believe it.
Im kind ,and give many things, inc money ,to any of persons in need. I have a groups of homeless beggars ..i help out daily. They all know me by name!
Took her away on holiday ,with us, my 2 pugs her dog, a Jack Russell.
So he went home with my mum to her 2 other children.
I forgave my father,, and in those years i cleaned and looked after him .
Especially a lifetime of it.
Your thinking ,but those kids would have been street wise?
One women pretended to my husband she wanted to see me for coffee ,and make friends.
I don,t even have a pension.
I know ,a lot about trauma.
Yes, a stroke or heart attack is the reason on your death certificate.
The apprentership one gets in Extreme Big T Trauma childhood is insight and extreme awarness.
Would this be the day?
I am a twin , my twin is a boy called Alan. I had a sister and 2 other brothers
Why do we forgive? Because if we don,t
19 years ,i spent with dear old papa.
He took out the hammer, and explained again, how the smallest tap ,of this hammer would kill me in a second.
The coal was sharp, and i usually had no underware! So my bare arse ,was cut and rossened on the coal..
But there where , these other acts only us 2 girls, would receive, (When id have rather had his lump hammer , and chisel.).
And don,t forget my 4 months alone, in the incubator. Knowing my brother in the womb and my mother voice .The baby knows she’s alone!
Everytime, i saw a chronically ill person in middle years.
Even in the coal hole, i said the lines in my head..
She was deluded, and thought she could stay on for the reminder of the holiday!
He did pay me though, i made him (.After i’d trudged miles to get his pension ) Before ,it all was gone, over the pubs counter!
Why did i forgive my father ?
They look at me amazed ,and ask me how i could possibly know it?
He said i’d end up like her, and he laughed his big rolicking bear of a laugh!
Im still living with it.
We all went to grammer schools
This is how, and why children get BPD.
I think the readers, may guess!
They are buried together, in the same grave..
I will be 64.
My mother wasn’t a tactile women ..only as babes could she touch us. After we grew ,she couldn,t touch any of us.
Comes on , in middle age.
I do have abandomment issues but they come from being left alone ,without my mum, or any of my family in a incubator for 4 months.
And, all my friends down the years ,where users.
And when you live in a life , of being terrified, and shocked, and permantly stressed; especially as a child born in to all this .
Then later on when my husband had gone to the bar..she started telling me, that they where having a affair, and that he loved her much more then me ,and other loads of visious lies.
My twin will have involuntary pissed himself, but not me at least not, that day!
Im dying but, im not bitter.
She was in good health!
Im constanly in a state of FLIGHT or FIGHT my whole life
It comes from Big T Trauma and is no fault of anyone who has it.
The only way to get rid of it forgood ,is sommence therapy,
She loved him until the end.
But im a psyci anyway, and i read energy and people, .
I never cut or harmed myself..
Then he’ d take out his beloved lump hammer ,show it to the kids.
He had many friends, who didn,t know the home devil he was, for his sake ,i never enlighted them either.
I did write a poem about him though, and my mum.
One cannot hold on to bitterness.
I immediatly know and see what their chidhood was. I tell them you had a awful time in childhood.
I had offered the whole expense of the holiday to her, free.
His mum and dad ,were Alcoholics!